Rope Play

Rope bondage is my kink.

I fell into it when me and my first wife started exploring fetishes. I was exploring to see what I found pleasing or interesting, and I saw several photos of shibari style rope bondage. I explored it further, doing research into what can be done, what should be avoided, and what safety precautions you should do prior to starting. It became an instant favorite of mine, and I spent the last 10 plus years experimenting, researching, and practicing. And while I can honestly say I am confident in my abilities as a rigger (the guy who does the tying), there is so much to explore because rope play is intricate and beautiful. 

When choosing your first rope, you want a piece that's long enough to explore with, comfortable against the skin, and thin enough to cut in emergencies. A lot of people will suggest jute or hemp rope starting out, but my personal experience has lead me to suggest Japanese silk rope, which is common in most sex shops. They usually come in 30 foot lengths and in a variety of colors.  If the price is not to your liking, or if you don't want to accidentally draw attention to it, a simple 30 foot length of braided nylon will work as well, and you can find these at Lowes, Home depot, or any other hardware store. 

If you decide that you want to explore rope play, there are several major safety practices you need to practice before you involve another person. The two biggest safety concerns in rope play is cutting off circulation and accidental choking/suffocation. There is a high risk of both if you don't know what you're doing, so safety needs to come first. 

First and foremost, you need to do research. You can't just start tying people up thinking it's sexy, while they're losing feeling in their extremities. One wrong knot placement, and you'll end up in the hospital instead of having intimacy. And while a lot of the more extreme photos you may see will show people in positions that look highly dangerous, understand that those types of rigging are done in a controlled setting by professionals who have been practicing for years, if not decades.  You can find thousands of videos available online, most of them free, or purchase books from authors who specialize in this field (I got links to my favorite teachers under the resources page), as well as social media pages you can go to.

Second, secure a set of safety scissors. You should never practice anything with rope without a good sharp set of scissors that you can easily get to. Accidents can and will happen, even to professional riggers, and it is crucial to have scissors nearby to get the riggee (the tied up person) back into a point of safety. Rope is cheap and easily replaceable. A life is not. 

Third, practice! I can't stress this enough, it is important to practice each knot, cinch and tie carefully. It's a good idea to practice either on a mannequin, a pillow, or yourself if possible. You may see something that looks intricate and want to try it, but it is better to start with the basics first. 

• A simple body harness is a good place to start. It looks pretty, and can be worn under clothes. This is a good starter piece that can even be done solo. Here's a video that is an excellent tutorial on the basic body harness.
• A wrist tie is good for restraining wrists together, although you can use it to restrain other body parts. The idea of this tie is to restrain a body part to another object or body part. This could be ankles to ankles, wrist to wrist, ankle to wrist, wrist to bedpost, ankle to chair, and etc. Done right, it will do its job while also making sure the riggee still has circulation in the affected region. You can watch this video to see how it's done. 
• A Cat's paw is a quick and efficient way to create a restraint that can be added to a piece of furniture with ease, and is in my opinion one of the first restraining knots you should learn if you want to add bondage sessions in the bedroom. 

Here are some illustrated advice memes I found floating on various Facebook groups that focus primarily on shibari,  the Japanese form of rope bondage. They offer quick tips once you've got the basics down. 

Rope play is an effective start point for those wanting to explore bondage. And while these three suggestions are good starting points, you can find more resources online and in books. Just make sure you have scissors handy, listen to your partner, and have fun.